Square Dance of the Apocalypse

Lucifer. Scratch. Prince of Lies. The Walkin’ Dude. Lord of the Flies. Satan. The Devil. The Serpent. By any name, the Emperor of Evil is the Enemy of all that is good, right and holy. You dig?

I’m sure many folks have heard the saying, “The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing [people] he wasn’t real.” (Yes, I’m very well aware that’s probably NOT the exact wording…but there are so many versions from so many sources that the nuts have become unimportant; the meaning behind the mantra is the only thing that matters…besides, it’s kinda fun to piss of the anal retentives in any given audience, isn’t it?) 

The scary thing is, part of this statement is completely true–at least, in a manner of speaking. It matters not if you’re a believer, or what (if any) religion you subscribe to. The truth I think we can ALL get behind is the “…convincing people he wasn’t real” part. Because I believe the majority of the human beings clapping their hands in rhythmic idiot glee while our little ball of blue turns ’round her fiery partner in the endless Cosmic Square Dance DO NOT believe the Horned One is “real”. At least, not in the same way you yourself are “real”…but don’t worry. I’m not gona get existential (well, any more than usual).

Once the ultimate bogeyman, “The D” has become a mere cartoon of his former fork-tailed self.

It might be surprising to learn that even many Christians will downplay the physical reality of the Baddest Bad Guy From Down Under (NOTE: this name could also be applied to Crocodile Dundee. Which makes sense, as I’m fairly certain the Aussie is at least a first cousin to the Pope of the Pitt). Some church folks may wax philosophical about the Father of All Evil: you’ll hear a lot of phrases like: “the personification of the destructive universal force” OR “a force diametrically opposed to the constructive energies as represented by the Deity” OR “a potent symbolic reminder of the duality of humanity, in that one cannot have good without evil to contrast it” et cetera. The Figurehead of Fear has been unmade thanks to poor brand recognition. Next time you’re vacationing in the Third World, show your favorite Hieronymus Bosch picture starring El Diablo to your favorite starving, fly-faced local. He or she will probably surprise you by recognizing the Duke of Demongoats right away.

So what happened to change the world’s worst public image problem? Not much. Just a forked tail, a horn or two, and a pitchfork. In Bosch’s day, those things scared the pee out of folks. Between the Medeival/Rennaisance period (roughly 900 A.D. to 1700 A.D.) and the mid-20th century, the stereotypical images that once frightened now amused. Without changing the basics, the image itself became a rather formulaic funnybook: take Casper (of Friendly Ghost fame), give him a bad sunburn, draw on a tail and some horns. Abracadabra! You’ve got Hot Stuff, the L’il Devil everyone loves! Funny? You betcha!

But there ain’t nothin’ funny about the end of the world. 

You see, the New World Order (and their evil robots) took a lesson from Lucifer. Controlling the hearts, minds (and souls) is sickening it’s so easy. And it’s even EASIER if you make people think nothing like that could EVER happen (Don’t be silly! This is America!). Steps Two and Three go further than even the Incredibly Foul One did: humiliate anyone who publicly speaks out against the NWO as a white seperatist (or supremist), a child molester, and/or a nut-job in general.

The cure for 1984 is 1776. 

So does this mean ALL conspiracy theories are the product of the Great American Nut-job? In a word: no. In two words: Probably not. In seven words: Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition.

The end (nigh or not-so-nigh) is on its way. Its face is familiar but fickle: now it looks amazingly like George Bush Jr., shortly it may resemble Barack Obama.

Whoever their master, evil robots are all the same: they’re evil. And they’re robots. And while we’re square dancing, they’ll be quietly and quickly replacing the threats to their rule.

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1 Comment

  1. good write,
    cheers, tim

    p.s. the mark of “the Beast” is just a bad haircut


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